Today...I'll write.

When I was in 2nd grade, I remember getting lost in the art of writing. I loved creating, allowing my imagination to come out on paper. I would sit at my moms type writer and write out short stories. The first story I remember writing was about these silly monsters. They weren't scary at ALL, just very silly. As I reached my teen years, I absolutely fell in love with poetry. There was something so deep about it. Poetry was able to ignite feelings in me that other forms of art couldn't. In my early twenties I finally decided it was okay to let the world around me know that I could SING. My writing morphed into song writing. Little lyrical poems. I found such happiness in putting pen to paper. Hours would go by as I was lost creating something from deep inside of my soul.

When I became a christian, this art was set to the side. I needed to get to know the CREATOR, THE ONE who made me in His image. Slowly, as I grew in Understanding His word, I began to write songs about Him. As I grew spiritually, I found it hard to enjoy writing. I wondered why. Maybe its because I was insecure, Maybe it was because it FELT much deeper than anything I had ever experienced while in the world, Maybe it's because I couldn't find the words to describe Him. All the adjectives, and experiences that I had, just seems mediocre when I penned them. There was just something missing. I felt much more careful with my thoughts. Maybe it's because I'm afraid of rejection. I'm sure its a cocktail of ALL of these things, intermingling, like a Dam in my soul.

Two of my favorite writers are, Novelist Francine Rivers, and Song Writer John Mark McMillan. They've got it!!!! When I read their writing, It's SOUL shaking! They've broken the levy and living waters flow from them. When I read through the Psalms, I desire to be honest and emotional, pouring out everything inside. But it's like a levy that just won't break.

So, I've committed to writing daily. I've committed to posting weekly.

I wonder if its been a long dry season because writing is something that I have not fully surrendered to Jesus. Like it was something that was just ALL mine...I've prayed for the last 12 years for God to open up the floodgates. Today I'm surrendering this gift to Him, may He use me and grow me...Like a whittled arrow, In His hands.